April 20th, 2010

Poker Dragons Hold ‘Em Or Fold ‘Em

I was looking through a poker magazine at work one day when I saw an ad for something that I just had to have. A total impulse buy. It was a set of ceramic figurines from The Hamilton Collection which featured four dragons playing a game of poker. And it even included a little poker table complete with a real felt top. Perhaps you may have seen this. It's the Poker Dragons Hold ‘em or Fold ‘em Collection. Each piece is $20 plus shipping, but I seriously couldn’t resist.

I placed my order right away and started receiving the pieces in the mail, about one every month or two. I soon realized there were more than five pieces in the collection though when I started receiving ones not pictured in the ad before I got all the ones that were pictured.

In addition to the table and four original poker players, there are two additional players, a waitress, a bartender, a pit boss, a security guard, and some delivery guy. I currently have twelve pieces, and I just found out that another is on its way. It’s not like the cost of these figures are completely draining my bank account or anything, but I am just curious as to how many there are in the entire collection. And I hate to cancel my subscription before completing the full set.

I would say though that I am pleased with the quality of the collection. The figures are colorful, very detailed, and make an excellent display for any poker or dragon lover. The only thing I'm pissed about is I'm running out of places to put the damn things.

April 6th, 2010

Alabama Hot Pocket

I just recently found out that an Alabama Hot Pocket is the act of a guy taking a shit in a woman's vagina and then having sex with her.

I felt this was useful information and decided to pass it on.

April 1st, 2010

Miley Cyrus Mauled By Dog

Teeny Boppers around the world were shocked today to find out that singing sensation Miley Cyrus had been attacked by a dog near her North Hollywood home early this morning.

Miley was outside when a pedestrian walking their German Shepherd passed her by. The pedestrian recognized Miley Cyrus and stopped to ask her for an autograph. Miley was obliged. She also took notice to the dog and bent down to pet the creature. That's when the dog jumped on Miley and began tearing at her face.

Miley was rushed to North Hollywood Medical Center where she began emergency treatment to stitch up her wounds. Doctors felt she was lucky to be alive as Miley had lost a lot of blood and even a chunk of her nose.

After Miley is healed and her stitches are removed, she will most likely need to go through plastic surgery to reconstruct her face. She will never look the same though and may even be unrecognizable. Some experts feel that after facial reconstruction, Miley would resemble the offspring of Susan Boyle, the Scottish singer who surprised everyone on America's Got Talent in 2008, and Rocky Dennis, the boy who suffered from lionitis in the movie Mask.

Disney has yet to comment on the incident, but it appears as though Miley Cyrus' singing and acting career are more than likely over.

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